Someone Else's Shoes

Note from blogger Cathy Benko: As you know, from time-to-time we like to mix things up a bit by inviting guest bloggers to contribute to our community. The guest picks the topic and the message. Following is a pertinent topic for all of us, regardless of gender or generation. At least I think so. But more important: What do you think? Cathy

With people working longer and job and career changes becoming ever-more common, more and more of us will find ourselves in the position of working for a manager who is younger than we are or in the sometimes uncomfortable position of having to supervise someone with potentially years more “experience” than that of our own. It’s important not to let potential tensions further widen the generation gap.

Prior to entering the corporate world, I was a practicing geriatrician, which gave me much insight into the generational divide. When aging parents start to relinquish some control of their lives over to adult children to manage, the transition can be bumpy. For the patient, going from a position of authority to one of deference can surface feelings of inadequacy and personal failure. Meanwhile, the adult child often fails to act in a timely and efficient fashion because they are unaccustomed to the role of decision-maker. A key part of fostering a working relationship is acknowledging the potential for these feelings upfront and encouraging each to voice their feelings and concerns. As the third-party, the sooner that I established that we all have a common goal, the better the care of the patient.

This applies to the job site, too. While workplace issues may not be fraught with the emotional complexities of the parent-child relationship, there is no doubt that such feelings between employees of different ages, either chronological or experiential, do exist and can manifest themselves in very petty ways. It can be very difficult to put these emotions aside and focus on the real goal: sealing the deal, completing the task, adding to the bottom line. If you find that you are having difficulties relating to one of your colleagues or cannot seem to figure out their thought process or problem-solving style, fall back on an old adage. It is true. You can learn a lot about someone by putting yourself in their shoes.

And remember, whether our heels are well-trodden or new, Payless or Prada, we all put them on one foot at a time.

By Dr. Brent Ridge, Executive Health Columnist for Forbes.com; faculty member of Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York; and Vice President for Healthy Living at Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia

Comments

[Tiffany in Chicago]

Outstanding posting and very well written. Thank you for the reminder that no matter what our age or background, increaingly the "age paradigm" is now the norm. There is much to give, and much to learn, from each end of the spectrum. Do we not find some of the greatest wisdom from the children? Thank you.

[Kevin in St. Louis]

Your closing comments put the issue into its most relevant context...this is a business issue. For all the same reasons WIN is truly important, it is also important to understand and acknowledge generational differences. Doing so allows us to connect better as professionals and extract more value for our clients, the organization and ourselves.